Soft Skills for School Librarians
Course
Managing Workplace Conflict [4:01]
Learn strategies to navigate workplace conflict—and minimize it in the future.
First, acknowledging common ground. Second, avoiding conflict-based language. Third, building awareness of emotional responses. And fourth, employing empathy.
First, see if you can establish common ground with your colleague at the start of a conversation. You both might have different opinions about how to handle a situation, but you likely share the same goal: to educate students. Fellow teachers, administrators, and parents want the same thing you do: to help students build critical thinking skills, to inspire their intellectual curiosity, and to enable them to engage in responsible citizenship. Agreeing up front on the particular outcome you both want from a situation can do a lot to make sure that the following conversation is both respectful and productive, no matter how opinions might differ. Think about starting conversations with an opening statement like, "First, I'm sure we both agree that we want our students to improve their research methods." And go from there.
The second step in minimizing conflict is to avoid conflict language. We often view our daily interactions as a sort of competition, in which someone must be "right," and someone else must be "wrong." Instead of viewing the other person as an opponent, recognize him or her as a member of your own team.
Even small adjustments in our language can make a big difference. Here's an example: rather than weighing heavily on words that emphasize the separation between the two of you with claims like "You should follow my policy if you want your students to meet your requirements," consider repositioning the statement to, "Let's look at how this policy can help our students meet the objective." Words like "we" and "us" can do a lot to help avoid the appearance of finger-pointing and blame, focusing instead on teamwork and collaboration.
The third step is to stay aware of your emotional state during difficult conversations. Because we're all human, we can't help but respond emotionally to challenges we face at work. But when we respond to a comment in the heat of the moment, our emotions can lead us to say or write something we may not mean. The solution can be a simple one, such as taking a breath, or counting to five before responding to a colleague. This can help us take the moment we need to maintain a calm state of mind and shape our reply accordingly.
And finally, remember the most important skill we have to help avoid conflict: empathy. When we make an effort to understand someone else's point of view, we show them respect. And mutual respect helps ensure that even a passionate argument is conducted civilly. To help you communicate empathetically practice paying close attention to what others are saying with their words and body language. Listen to understand, not to answer. Acknowledge the other person's perspective. And be authentic in how you express yourself. Empathy can be a bridge between contrasting points of view.
As the librarian, for the benefit of your students, you have to work with everyone in the school—no matter how well you inherently get along with them. So when you find yourself in the midst of a workplace conflict, use the steps of acknowledging common ground, avoiding conflict-based language, building awareness of emotional responses, and employing empathy to charter a peaceful path out of the conflict and into a place of compromise and mutual understanding.
If you want to get better at playing the violin, you practice. Want to be a more agile martial artist? Practice. This goes for conflict management, too. But, that doesn't mean you have to pick a fight with your co-worker! Use the below scenarios to help you practice the four principles that were discussed in the "Managing Workplace Conflict" video: acknowledging common ground, avoiding conflict-based language, building awareness of emotional responses, and employing empathy.
The following scenarios present tough interpersonal situations that might arise at work. Read through the scenarios and write down your ideas for how to deal with them—or better, yet, act them out with a colleague.
Justine has recently started collaborating with Caroline, a new teacher. They sat together to plan out their objectives and roles and seemed to be on the same page. However, once the unit started, Caroline interrupted Justine in front of the students any time that it was Justine's turn to lead the instruction. Justine didn't want to create a scene in front of the students but felt extremely frustrated that Caroline wasn't trusting or accepting her method of instruction. How would you advise Justine to deal with this situation with Caroline? Write out some specific options for what Caroline could say.
Taylor has recently been put on an "implementing district goals" committee with other members of the school administration and faculty. At the first meeting, people were talking over each other, yelling, and focusing on personal disagreements rather than conceptual ideas. Taylor has a reputation for being even-keeled and the faculty committee head asked Taylor to lead the next meeting with the goal of better cooperation among the group. What advice would give Taylor for facilitating that meeting to minimize conflict and maximize collaboration?
Carlos recently hired a new library aide. At first, their working relationship is solid—the aide asks questions for clarification, is kind to students, and seems happy to be in the library. However, after a few weeks, Carlos begins to notice that the quality of her work, which had been strong, is slipping: books are incorrectly shelved; she skips key principles during the student helper orientation; and, new materials are stacking up, unprocessed. Carlos wants to maintain their positive relationship, but also knows he must confront the aide about these issues. How would you recommend Carlos approach the situation?
MLA Citation
"Soft Skills for School Librarians: Practicing Conflict Management." School Library Connection, April 2019, schoollibraryconnection.com/Content/Course/2194644?learningModuleId=2194635&topicCenterId=0.
Entry ID: 2196951
Additional Resources
About the Authors
Email: rmorris@schoollibraryconnection.com
Twitter: @rebeccajm87.
E-mail: charvey@schoollibraryconnection.com
Twitter: @caharvey2
MLA Citation
"Soft Skills for School Librarians. Managing Workplace Conflict [4:01]." School Library Connection, ABC-CLIO, April 2019, schoollibraryconnection.com/Content/Course/2194644?learningModuleId=2194635&topicCenterId=0.
https://schoollibraryconnection.com/Content/Course/2194644?learningModuleId=2194635&topicCenterId=0
Entry ID: 2194644